A New Narrative + #MyPostMonday Linky

Some people never change, and then some do! It's funny how some people I haven't seen in many years will reappear and somehow they are different than when I knew them back in the day.

For instance, one of my high school friends whom I knew quite well was so boy crazy! Everything she did was done to impress and snag a boy! I used to think, "Girl, get a grip. There is more to life than just boys!" Needless to say she met someone right out of high school, her prince charming, and got married. Unfortunately, it ended in divorce.

To know her now is to see her minus the boy crazy, self-absorbed personality she once had. Now, she is all about her children, her grandchildren and about making a better world around her. She is absolutely wonderful to be around. My thoughts about her are that she has really changed and has caught hold of the important things in life. I know she will again find love because she is a beautiful person. But it isn't the all-consuming passion of her life that it once was. She has broadened her scope.

Have I changed too? How have my experiences changed and shaped me? Do former acquaintances see a gentler, more compassionate person or do they see the same impulsive, crazy, moody person I once was?

10 Ways To Tempt Fate Other Than Covid-19 + #MyPostMonday Linky

Do you know how many ways there are to put yourself in harm's way? I was floored by just a few of these U.S. statistics!

Being Murdered: 1 in 11,000

Being Robbed:  1 in 400

Being Burglarized: 1 in 50

Women dying in childbirth:  1 in 12,500

Death from earthquake or volcano: 1 in 11 million

Death From Leaking Gas: 1 in 12 million

Injury in an elevator:  1 in 6 million

Death from ingesting detergent: 1 in 23 million

Infection from flesh-eating bacteria:  1 in 170,000

Being hit by a meteor: 1 in 150 trillion

 Of course, these are just a few ways that someone can really mess with their mortality in a big way. The statistics make death by any one way fairly rare. But combine all the ways to off yourself, and the chance of dying is probably close to 1 in 100 at any given time. Yet up until recently, people were OK with taking chances. It seems so interesting that for the past 2 months, people have severely curtailed their risk-taking activities. Yet, it hasn't prevented deaths from happening from things other than Covid-19. People are still getting killed doing crazy things. Car accidents still happen, drownings still happen, plane crashes, and murders still happen!

I guess what that tells me is that no matter how careful you are, no matter how much the government tells you to stop risky behavior, the fact is some people are going to die. What else does that say to me? I need to live life the best way I know how, in the safest way I know how, but above and beyond that, I can't prevent my own demise. I will die when I die.

My goal, then, is to make sure that I'm not afraid of death, that I'm prepared to die and that I've made peace with those I need to make peace with. Do I want to go quietly or do I want to go out with people actually missing me? I think the latter. How do I do that? I'll take a cue from this quote: "How carefully most men (and women) creep into nameless graves, while now and again one or two forget themselves into immortality." --Phillips Brooks

If we (note: we=I) could just forget for 2 seconds about how we look or how we feel or how we are perceived by others in favor of just going out and making someone else's day a little bit brighter, I think that our problems would seem a little less significant all of a sudden!

So maybe along with the prioritizing, financial goal setting, social posturing, dream boards and self-affirmations, we set aside some time to wonder how best we can serve another! Then when we do die, whatever way that may be, we'll have really lived to the fullest!

Today is "My Post Monday!", a curation of my picks of the week's best original content. It's all about posts from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize(Affiliate links welcome)

Laugh At It + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

I have a ding on my front lower calf that is lingering a year later, after the incident originally happened. But every once in awhile, when I look at it, I am reminded of a couple of lessons I learned because of it.

It was late summer of last year and I was taking a walk with my dog in a beautiful part of where I live. I saw a massive storm cloud coming in quickly from the south. It was really close, but it wasn't raining on me. And so I watched the rain from a distance as I continued my walk. The rain shower was short. But then the most gorgeous rainbow appeared. It was a perfect bow and it seemed so close that I could literally touch it. I was blown away by the beauty of it.

The Brain Drain + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

This summer I have decided to do some things for my own self-improvement and also do some projects that haven't had the chance to get done because of work during the school year. 

I have made some lists, some goals, and some resolutions to that end. There are some long range goals, weekly goals, and daily goals.  

I feel pretty motivated so far and some things definitely have been accomplished. But what I've come to realize is that no matter how much free time I have, no matter how motivated I am, there will always be something that makes the accomplishment of my goals more difficult than I had originally planned. 

My brain really wants to accomplish things, but my body isn't cooperating so much. So many wasted minutes and seconds, doing mindless activities like looking at my phone, staring into space, forgetting what I went into a room to do, remembering something I wanted to do but didn't include on my master list and doing it anyway.  Binge eating, binge napping, binge t.v. watching...

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A Better American + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

Today is Memorial Day. How has your day been? Mine was great! I feel like we can't give enough honor to all of the great men and women who have served so selflessly, above and beyond the call of duty. So I ask myself, what can be done to make these men and women's sacrifice more appreciated and worth their fight? And the thought occurred to me that we can do honor to our veterans by being better citizens of the country that they have given their lives to protect, the good 'ol USA!

How can we be better Americans? Here's a couple of ideas that I think would be helpful, based on my experience. I'm sure there are so many others:

• Let's have more respect for one another. When we're out and about, or sitting alone in front of the screen, let's be respectful and aware that there are others who are every bit as entitled to courtesy and an opinion as we are!

• Let's be happy and grateful to put in a good day's work. The ability to work is awesome, and there are plenty of opportunities to do it. The opportunity to get out and contribute to society by providing a service is amazing!

• Let's not be so worried about what the person next to us has.

• Let's vote for our candidates of choice but not go postal if they don't win.

• Let's be respectful of candidates that win by the voice of the people.

• Let's keep our Constitution intact and not tear it apart just so we can get what we want. (Ex. The Founding Father's knew there was a reason for the electoral collage. It provides for people from all walks of life to be represented and counted. Don't try to eliminate it just because it means that your candidate won't win because of sheer numbers. There's much more to it than that.)

• Let's give liberally to the charities of our choice and not simply think that the Government should take care of everyone. It can't, and it never will.

• People always come first. Period.

• Study history, science and other disciplines on your own. Don't just trust what a teacher or professor tells you. Be your own fact checker. There are a lot of pretenders out there,willing to skew facts, data, and outright lie to get their agendas accomplished.

• Let's not trust everything on the internet. Make sure that we know our sources. (That would include this post!) 

And there you have it, my How-to on how to make sure that our veterans are valued even more for the great sacrifices they have rendered to our country! As we become more considerate, thoughtful and smarter about our chosen philosophies, we will render the thanks that every veteran holds dear, a country that is united, free, and indivisible under God!

  Today is "My Post Monday!", a curation of the week's best original content. It's all about posts from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize(Affiliate links welcome)    

It's Just Stuff + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

Recently we went out to dinner and a movie, or should I say pizza and a movie, with some friends and something that we said about taking care of my dad triggered our friend into a story about how her sister has taken over her father's trust and estate and is spending it down like it's her own, even though there are 3 other siblings who are wondering what the heck she is doing. Apparently, when her father was at his least competent, shortly before he died, she went in and had him sign over the whole thing to her and then went to an attorney to make it legal. It has been such a heartbreak because the sister is being reckless and disposing of keepsakes and other valuables without any of the rest of the family's permission. Just to be able to have something that belonged to their parents, the family has to buy it from their sister at an exorbitant price. It's crazy that families can be like that.

So, how concerned are you about property or money settlement issues within your extended family?  I know it can be a sore spot.  When a parent or relative gives out holdings in an unfair way or in a way that people don't agree with, tensions within families can mount.  But is it worth disenfranchising your own family, or worse? If it comes right down to it, I'd rather just let them have the heirloom china and wish them good luck with it.  You can't take it with you anyway!

But that is exactly what happens sometimes. I heard of a story that happened several years ago in Louisa, VA.  A man shot and killed his own son and nephew in an ongoing dispute over a piece of property, not to mention the 4 others that were wounded in the fray.  Then police shot and killed him after he fired on two deputies and released his pit bull on them. Apparently, this 1.5 acres was a real hot commodity among family members. Police were called on multiple occasions to settle disputes amongst the clan.  But it never got violent until that point. 

 Well, sir, I hope you are happy.  You're dead, your son is dead, your nephew is dead, making for a fun-filled party on the other side!  And who gets the 1.5 acres?  I guess whoever was left alive!  I hope the remaining relatives will be a little more wise.  Wow!  I used to live in Virgina.  I'd have to say you might be a redneck if... you bring out the .22 caliber when your limited vocabulary of "Thisheer is ma land...ain't no one else's!" fails to bring about a unanimous agreement!

May I suggest a few ways to insure a peaceful estate settlement when the time arrives?

1.  Only involve the individuals who are named in the will or trust.  The fewer outsiders and outside opinions, the better! Spouses and children who are not directly a part of the settlement don't need to be involved.

2.  Start the conversation!  Many times it is awkward to even mention that someone won't be around forever.  Many times people are afraid that they will sound greedy when talking about estate affairs.  A possible good start to this conversation might be:  "Mom, Dad, I know you love us. You have taught us how to be thoughtful, caring people, by example. I am reasonably certain that you want us to care for you in your old age and for each other when you are gone. You could do a lot to keep the spirit of our family alive and healthy after you are gone by talking to us now. You could make it immensely easier on all of us by giving us some information about your wishes and plans. This is not about money. It is about relationships and trust and responsibility.”

3.  Establish trust between family members - Family history and child rearing methods of prior generations can foster distrust between siblings. Competition among siblings is common. Although it might not be the easiest time, it is a crucial time to build trust among family members.  Do so with open dialogue and transparency of intent.  Now is not the time to have hidden agendas.  

4.  Learn as much as possible - Usually there is one primary executor but if the work is shared, not only is it easier on the executor, the beneficiaries will also have a better understanding of what is involved and have a greater stake in the best resolution for the whole family.

Turn Disadvantages Into Advantages + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

When I feel at a disadvantage, many times I practice an exercise designed to turn my perceived disadvantages into advantages. It's all about perspective!

For instance, sometimes I get bummed out when I see all of the delicious food that my husband can eat and not gain any weight! If I ate like he did, I would be as wide as I am tall in no time! I am shorter, small-boned, and have a low BMR (basal metabolic rate). What advantages could I possibly see in being short, and not able to eat as much as my husband, since I do LOVE food and could easily eat as much as he does?

Here are a some food benefits that I found I have, as a portion-limited, vertically-challenged, horizontally-inclined, way over 40 female:

1) I won't get bored with foods as easily, since I can't eat as much of them. I can spread them out over a longer period of time!

2) Food prep is more convenient for me Since my portions are smaller, I can spend less time in prepping my meals for work because I don't need as much!

3) It's so much cheaper for me to eat! 1500 calories vs. 2600 calories per day definitely adds up over time and an extra 1100 calories a day turns into big money quickly!

4) I have less likelihood of dental disease because with less food in my mouth, there is less exposure to bacteria-feeding foods and sugars.

5) What one meal at a restaurant is for other larger people, can be 2 - 3 meals for me, lots of yummy leftovers! 

6) I will be more able to survive the apocalypse because my caloric requirements to stay alive are much smaller than for someone with a 6"2 frame and a raging BMR.

See what I did there? I can pull out some viable benefits from what formerly looked to be an extremely unfair situation. And I can do this with so many other scenarios that I run into. It does take a conscious effort to think about what advantages there are in what looks to be a horrible deal of the deck. But once you start looking at things this way, you will begin to start living your life differently and start taking the things that have been thrown your way and make them work for you. Everything can be used as a stepping stone if you can but look at it that way! 

C.S. Lewis stated it this way, "It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it." I love that statement! Call it a disadvantage if you want to, but the way you deal with it will make all the difference!

Practice: Take a perceived mishap or disadvantage this week and list at least 4 ways where you see it could become a real advantage!  

 Today is "My Post Monday!", a curation of the week's best original content. It's all about posts from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize! (Affiliate links welcome!)   

Good's Enemy + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

On my last "My Post Monday", I was pondering about how personality disorders and mental illnesses affect everyone involved. One of the most common of these is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It stems from an obsession with being perfect. It's so sad because it robs the victim of time, satisfaction, self-esteem, and happiness. Of course, it's great to be good at something. It's great to be excellent at something, and there are even times to be perfect at something. But my experience is that getting something done at all requires letting go of some things so the task can be completed. 

Being chronically late is one symptom of OCD. One tries to get ready as perfectly as possible, it never seems to be achieved, and then comes the never-ending late arrival, or the arrival that never happens. I dealt with it as a kid, and now as an adult. Two different members of my family. Not myself, mind you, someone close to me. As a result, I am always late or going ahead because I don't want to be late. But I am affected by the symptom.

So often we are reaching for that perfect event, evening, dress, dessert, party, or whatever it might be. When it falls short of our expectations, we discount it as a failure! Is the picture above anything short of gorgeous?  I would go to a party held here. And especially this time of year! I'd be trying to take a peek out of that top window! Yet look at all of the "flaws!" Flaws are what make us unique, gorgeous, and US! Celebrate difference and perceived imperfections! We're all amazing!

Today is "My Post Monday!", a curation of the week's best original content. It's all about posts from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize! (Affiliate links welcome!)   

Determination Could Save Your Life + #MyPostMonday The Week's Best Original Content

I sometimes wonder exactly how much grit and determination I would have if I were stuck out in the wilderness and no one knew where I was. Would I just lay down and hope against all hope that someone would rescue me, or would I do everything humanly possible to find a solution? If my recent experience of running out of gas on the freeway is any indication, it might be a very sketchy situation for me if I were in a more precarious scenario. 
I am a work-smarter-not-harder kind of person. But somehow my gas tank filling habits are definitely on the dumbed down side of my thought process, I am always seeing how far I can get before I absolutely have to fill up. 
And so I found myself trying to get home after work on fumes, constantly glancing at the gauge to see if I could make it to the next gas station. Fortunately, I was going downhill on the freeway and close to the exit, which I took, as my car slowed down---70, 60, 55---What made matters even worse was it was also the day I forgot my phone, so I couldn't call anyone. (Yes, it was a Monday and it had been a hectic pre-Christmas weekend.) There is obviously more than one way to run on fumes!
 I waited in the car with my flashers on for a full 26 minutes, not knowing where any gas stations were. I finally decided I needed to hoof it to someplace, any place, where there was a phone because no one seemed to want to stop and help this hapless woman, chilling in her car, flashers going, just barely off the exit ramp. I saw a distant building approximately 2 miles away that looked like an office setup. So I got out of the car and started walking. I hadn't walked 20 yards when I realized that on my right was a gas station that had been obscured by a small hill. That was my ticket to success and I was soon happily on my way. 
I could have waited in my car indefinitely, waiting for who knows what. I'm embarrassed that I waited for as long as I did.

Image - John Lloyd

And then there's the recent story of a woman who walked for 30 straight hours to find help when her family became stranded around the Grand Canyon because it was closed for the season. She wasn't about to give up. Her twin sister said that her personality is "Do it, or die trying."  She ended up eating pine twigs to keep herself from starving, drinking her own urine trying to keep herself hydrated and finally found a ranger cabin, breaking a window to get in, where she collapsed, barely conscious. Fortunately she was found. I've got to say, I admire her courage and her unwillingness to just lay down and give up. 
I think this kind of determination applies in a lot of different situations, not just life or death. What about you? Do you have the determination to "Do it, or die trying"?

 Today is "My Post Monday!" It's all about original content from bloggers who care to share what is on their minds--from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize! (Affiliate links welcome!) 

#MyPostMonday Link-Up--The Week's Best Original Content

Dreaming Vs. Living
Which of the following two philosophies do you subscribe to? 1) Dreaming is essential in order for you to visualize what you want in life. Imagining what life might or could be like gives someone motivation to eventually achieve their goals. Life without dreaming is not life at all. OR...
2) Don't waste your time daydreaming and live the good life that's right in front of you! A dreamer will never accomplish what a doer always will! 
Do you see the difference in these two philosophies? One of them comes from good authority, Harry Potter and The Philosopher's Stone by J.K. Rowling!

Image by Rochelle Chee

Can these two life ideals live peacefully side by side? I think it definitely depends on the situation.  

Philosophy #1 - Dream. It is so important to dream, to visualize, to ponder what it is that you want in life. Without it, one would never figure out what to aspire to, what you are capable of achieving, and what you need to look for if you indeed want to attain a certain goal. There is definitely a time and place to dream. But when and how much? My definite feeling would be to do that sometime at the start of the day and also at the end of the day, like a planning session in the morning and a debriefing session at night, leaving it all behind until the next day. During those moments, incorporate those powerful positive affirmations, prayers, meditation, list-making, and list check-offs. I think it is essential to do that. And it takes about 60 minutes total.

Philosophy #2 - Live. The rest of the 23 hours in your day are for you to live, to grab life and make it yours! We're here on this planet called earth, there's nothing we can do about it but relish it. Acknowledge our shortcomings, our inabilities, our abilities, our handicaps, and our misgivings. Take it all and live it because it will be gone before you know it! And that is where we get stuck a lot of the time, because we are afraid to live! 

I don't think living means that we are active and going full speed 24 hours of the day. Sometimes it means enduring things like waiting for others, doing less-than-exciting tasks, resting our bodies, strengthening our minds, and learning new things. That's OK! It's part of life and sometimes part of living means finding satisfaction and enjoyment in the most menial of tasks. 

But if we can find a balance between dreaming and living, I believe we have just found the sweet spot in life and are on the road to true happiness! Have you found the perfect balance between dreaming and living? 

 Today is "My Post Monday!" It's all about original content from bloggers who care to share what is on their minds--from Crafts to Camping, Wellness to Wealth, Fashion to Food, and whatever else is on the brain!  I  open up with a post of my own and then follow it up with a linky of the week's top original blog posts! It's all about what the writer thinks, believes, and knows--in other words, they are active, writing blogs. If I happen to find a great original, non-sponsored post, I'll link it up and share it with you here and on Twitter via the #MyPostMonday hashtag!  I can miss some amazing posts, but I don't want to!  So, in addition, if you'd like to link up yourself, you can do that too!  I'll visit your site, comment, promote and publicize! (Affiliate links welcome!)

#MyPostMonday Link-Up--The Week's Best Original Content!

 Exploring One Way Or The Other

With the trending craze and obvious popularity of the new "Poke Mon Go" App, I've been a little dumbfounded by the whole thing. There are things that I can see which are very detrimental to a generation of children, raised on staring down at a phone for inordinate amounts of time. But I just know if I was a kid when this came out, I'd be all over it too! To be given a certain amount of time by my parents to roam freely around a neighborhood, letting the game dictate where the next stop is would be amazingly liberating. But what about all the phone neck injuries from staring down so long, and the accidents that will inevitably happen to the unobservant? It was bad enough for me as a teenager, without Poke Mon! For example, I rode my bike into a road construction hole because it wasn't clearly marked and the sun had gone down. I was fortunate to avoid the rebar protruding out at all angles. I spent a mere two days in the hospital with bruised kidneys. Imagine what I'd be like staring down at a game!