Do you ever ask someone a question that seems to break open a floodgate of information that you really didn't intend on getting, but you get it anyway? A simple 'How Are You?' can trigger a load of information that may be better left on a counselor's couch than the two minutes you have available at the moment to listen. Somehow the person is just bursting to tell somebody, right then and there. And you happen to be the lucky person who gets to be the listening ear, whether you want to be or not. That is the time when one needs to gauge the importance of listening to a fellow human being in need of venting or the need to continue on your own course of scheduled work, which is always SO important, because you own that piece of time, to do with whatever you may and it will never return to you again.
This is what happened to me just the other day when I was on the job working for the Census. My job is to follow up with those folks who either didn't get their Census 2010 forms filled out and returned or they didn't get them for one reason or the other. Most of the time, things go really smoothly. I just need a count of who lived in the home on April 1st of 2010, the names if they have them, the dates of birth and race. That's it.
So, the other day (meaning sometime during the past two months) I knocked on a door and a kid answers (I say kid loosely, he was probably 22 - 23 years of age). He was really polite and told me that he'd be happy to answer the Census questions except for the fact that he had to rush to court. "I've GOT to make this". he said. "I'll be in a world of hurt if I don't." I wished him good luck and went on my way.
I found him home about a week later and he was in a more relaxed way and we proceeded to complete the census questionnaire both seated cross-legged on the front lawn. I casually asked him how his court date went and that's when the floodgates came open.
He told me a 30 minute story that was amazing. A short, watered down version goes like this: "My sister and "this guy" had been dating for awhile, when she decided to call it off. She, in the meantime, had decided to go on a mission for her church and was a virgin, saving herself for her marriage. She went back to "this guy's" house to retrieve some items she had left there. When she went into the house, he apprehended her and proceeded to assault her and rape her. I happened to come up to the house because I was going to pick her up. I heard her screaming before I got to the door and when I burst into the house, I saw "this guy" in the act of raping my sister. I did what anyone with any love or loyalty for their family would do, I took a baseball bat and beat him to a bloody pulp.By the time I was through with him, he was lucky to be alive. I told the cops what had happened and they told me they would do the same thing, if it had been them. But when I got to the police station, it was a different story. I was treated badly, put in jail, left there for 2 weeks before being allowed to leave with bail, and was told I would most probably serve a minimum 10-year sentence in prison for 1st degree assault, a felony." My eyes lit up and I gleefully exclaimed, because I'm bright like that, "So, THAT is where you were going in such a hurry when I came last time!" "Yes, that's right", he patiently acknowledged. By this time, I wasn't in as much of a hurry as I thought I was a few minutes before.
"So what happened in court?"
"Well, they were ready to throw the book at me and send me to prison for 10 years or more. The prosecuting attorney was demanding justice for what I had done, regardless of who "this guy" had hurt and who I was defending. Things looked pretty bleak. But then the defending attorney found some blatant discrepancies in the testimonies of the officers who were the first ones at the scene. At first they said one thing about my statements and then they retracted that and said something else. Because of that one thing, my defending attorney was able to get a jury to look at that and they found me 'Not Guilty' and I was dismissed of all charges. But even if I was found guilty and put in prison for years, I would still do the same thing. Nobody is going to do that to my sister and not hear from me. It turns out "this guy" was a married man and she didn't even know."
"I'm very glad that you're not in prison!" I said. And thanks for sticking up for your sister and yet not killing that guy! And most of all, thanks for helping me to help you get counted in Census 2010! Have a great day!"
As I drove away, I thought, "It's what anyone would do--listen to a fellow citizen!" I'm glad I took the time to listen. he needed it, but more than that, I needed it. And it gave me some definite things to think about.
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It's been a long week and I'm a little tired! The Census is well underway and as usual, everything should have been done yesterday, so while last month there were a lot of days where there was no work (and no pay), now, it's all the work you need and more! Yesterday I was in charge of an operation that involved doing an entire mobile home court in a town about 35 miles from me. There was only 1 person who showed up to help me, a sweet lady of about 60 years old. But we did OK, getting count of about 145 people. After that I was up until 1:30 am doing repetitive forms and back up at 6:00 to finish by the deadline. The sad thing is that a good amount of the respondents had already done their census forms (or said they did) and sent them in, but we still had to do it, just to make sure. Yes, there were also a lot who hadn't done it!
I ran into a lot of Spanish speakers and since I don't speak Spanish, I basically handed them a Spanish form and pointed to the items that needed to be filled in. They got the point and most were very nice about it. There was just the one Smart Alec who said he didn't have to. (Did you know it's the law, you are required by law to fill out the census!) I said, "Actually, yeah it's the law." He said, "Why are jew lying to me?" "Sir, I'm not lying! Please call my boss if you have questions!" (I flashed my badge with phone numbers). Luckily, there were no more comments from him after that.
I had a really scary moment when I walked into a fenced yard, knocked on the door and a very irate golden lab came charging out of a dog door! I wasn't too worried at first because Golden Labs are usually nice, aren't they? But this one apparently sensed my surprise and alarm and started snarling, barking and growling. I was not about to test him and proceeded to get the gate open as quickly as I could. Unfortunately, it was a trick latch and my fumbling fingers couldn't seem to open it. I prayed that I could get this gate open because the dog was upon me and my hind-quarters were very unprotected and exposed to sharp teeth. But I couldn't get the thing open. I had trapped myself in the lair of a howling monster - my imminent demise was certain! Fortunately the neighbors across the street saw my plight and started calling said monster off. The woman actually came over, yelling Spanish at the dog and even though he was still barking, it distracted him enough and gave me time to figure out the ridiculously complicated latch and hurriedly make my exit. Needless to say, I was very grateful to that very kind woman for saving my buttocks from being punctured! So yeah, I'm a little gassed! Nothing that a great weekend can't cure though!
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